(BlackDoctor.org) -- The National MS Society notes that over 400,000 people in the US have been diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). MS is a debilitating neurological disorder that most frequently strikes people in the prime of their lives, between the ages of 20 and 50 like Grant Hill's - wife and singer Tamia. Every hour someone learns they have MS, which can affect one's ability to speak properly, walk normally, or see clearly - like Richard Pryor. The emotional impact this disease has can make a strong, athletic, military man literally cry out for help - like Montel Williams. Studies have found that women are three times more likely than men to develop MS - I am also one of the many.

Last year, as people yelled Happy New Year at the stroke of midnight, I laid in bed thinking - Happy? But I have MS. There was no Beyonce's booty dancing that year, just me in constant thought of what this year was bringing. I was diagnosed on New Year's Eve after spending several months wondering what was wrong with me. The stilettos that I proudly would strut my stuff in were now replaced with some flat mules because my legs and feet were in so much pain. The pain you ask? It was that feeling you get when your foot falls asleep, the numb pins and needles feeling. However, it would not go away the next day or the day after that, no matter how much I tried to shake it out. Something was wrong. I could barely walk.

To know me is to hear me. That is, the klackety-klack of my heels as I walk down the hall. See, I'm one of those small women who walk really hard and with a whole lot of attitude. As an African American woman you learn at a young age that your walk defines you. From my colleagues in the office to my neighbors in my building, ask anyone who knows me, and they will tell you, "I knew that was you because of your walk." Now, that which defined me was threatened.

MS is a disease of the brain and spinal cord. Protective insulation, known as myelin that surrounds the nerves, known as axons, are damaged or destroyed as well as the nerves themselves. As a result, messages from the brain and spinal cord are reduced or lost and changes in body functions occur. For example, impaired mobility, cognitive changes, numbness, weakness, fatigue, visual disorders and chronic pain can occur. There are also stages of MS such as the kind I have, relapsing-remitting, which is the most common form. During this stage there are often few exacerbations - also known as acute attacks or relapses. After exacerbations, sometimes you stabilize, which may bring you back to normal or may leave you with some remaining disability. For me, it took some time to regain most of the strength in my legs. I started treatment, bought a pair of sneakers, exercised, followed a healthy diet, and didn't give up.

The physical changes I was going through were extremely hard to deal with, but nothing prepared me for the emotional impact this illness presented. Before my diagnosis, life was at it's best. With graduate school completed and my career underway I was on top of the world. Every day was filled with new adventures of dining, traveling, just simply living life to the fullest. I didn't let the social pressures typical of a young 30-ish single female hold me down. You know - people asking when are you going to get married, have children, what are you waiting for. With the diagnosis of MS, I started to look at my life differently, thoughts like - will I have the ability to work? How will I pay my bills? Will there be more physical problems or cognitive problems? Will I ever get married and can I have children? It was quite devastating!

With so many questions in my head, it was important to get answers from others like me. I met a lot of people who were instrumental in my healing by attending conferences, support groups, and doctor's appointments, but I didn't see too many young African American females like myself. Even in books and literature on MS, there wasn't much. Now I felt so alone. A friend knowing what I was going through gave me an article featured in Essence magazine around the same time of my diagnosis that gave testimony of a young African American "sista" dealing with MS. This article gave me such hope that I wanted to meet others.

Too often when I did come across someone like me, it was like WOW; such a sigh of shock and comfort to know that there are others. Immediately after introductions, conversations would explode about what appeared to be the obvious - like how there are fewer African Americans with MS than Caucasians. I also noticed other things, such as limb weakness as a common presenting symptom of MS more frequently among African Americans and learned about a study that suggests that the course of MS may be more aggressive among African Americans than others. Keep in mind, there are many who suffer with the symptoms and go years before getting an actual diagnosis and treatment, which could contribute to the aggressive course. With this in mind I felt it was extremely important to reach out to educate others about MS because an early diagnosis plays an important role when dealing with this disease.

Too often people refuse to seek help from a counselor, therapist or even a support group. Many believe that between being superwoman / man - working and/or raising a family, who has the time? Others believe that seeking help from a counselor, therapist or even a support group is a sign of weakness. The idea of telling someone else your business has prevented many from seeking help. Don't let that be your excuse! You are not alone. There are many others going through similar feelings and emotions. Speak to your doctor or contact your local MS Society who can refer you to support groups or social activities that can introduce you to others or if necessary a professional to talk to.

You have to believe that although you may have MS, it doesn't have to consume you; your state of mind is crucial when living with MS. How you think establishes your expectations. The better you feel about yourself the better you will feel and do. When your expectations are low, you feel defeated, may not go to the doctor or continue treatment, so have high expectations! The more you know the more in control of your illness you actually are.

Today, I have more good days than bad. With the support of my family and friends, I'm developing the new me! Now as I look back, I realize that my first year was indeed a new year. A year filled with new goals, new expectations, new friends, and most importantly, new beginnings. So as I embark upon the upcoming years, kicking my new flats to the latest song, I know this is truly a happy new year.

By A. Marie Johnson, MHS

A. M. Johnson, continues to share her story to educate and help others, especially young African American women to know that they are not alone or as she likes to say, "one of many." She has written an article for the United States Department of Health and Human Services. Currently her story is featured in Biogen Idec patient's support DVD and in the Faces of MS and Knowledge is Power series with the National MS Society. When she is not working as an inspirational speaker, support group facilitator, and peer counselor, she works with individuals diagnosed with mental retardation / developmental disabilities as an advocate ensuring their rights and services. For further information on MS contact the National MS Society at 1-800-FIGHT-MS or check the website at www.nationalmssociety.org.